If you have a bit of nice contact with yourself, being alone is usually not much of a problem. You are Al-one.
But for those who feel lonely, who are only with themselves and don’t have a nice contact with themselves, it can be a completely different story: constant judgments and blaming yourself can turn a time alone into a difficult period.
Then there are people who say, “You must love yourself first, before you can love others too.” That sounds like an invitation to (learn to) love yourself during this period. But in my experience it is not correct, that you should first love yourself before you can love another. It sounds like a process that you do alone. Loving, love, I think, is what we are learning together. We don’t do that alone.
Even if you are on your own now and you want to practice to love yourself, you already mention 2 parts: one (I) wants to learn to love the other (my self). One of the confusing elements that play a role in this may be the culture in which we live in the Western world: we are very individualistic, ‘I’- oriented. The oriental world is more system-based.
For example, in the Western world we put on a mouth mask to protect ourselves, while in the Eastern world we do this to protect others. That is more about what the system needs.
And when you see people hoarding, for fear of falling short, who do not think about the other person, but only about themselves, then shortages arise, which were not there in the first place. Enough for everyone to share, too little if everyone will only stock up for themselves.
The current circumstances show that it is now necessary to deal with this more with the view of the system.
And so one of the system-based measures is: “Withdraw from others and distance or isolate yourself for a period.”
And then you may be sitting on the couch with yourself now ….
Time for introspection. What if we replace the word quarantine (which originated in the time of the plague) with the word ‘retreat’. We isolate ourselves temporarily, we withdraw, to do spiritual research or spiritual work, to reflect, to search for new truths.
Then we have the space and time to recognize that judgments and blaming are thoughts. Thoughts you have come to believe in. Thoughts with which you have identified, which have become automatic thought patterns and from there you have acted.
Some people may find that you cannot seek or find love, but that love is something that has always been there, even within yourself. The point is to recognize that something has stopped you from being in love. Can you reconnect with that love? Can you start living a little more from that love, instead of from the automatic processes that have arisen? And can you see the world and each other more from that love?
And for the entrepreneurs who now have little or no income: it’s time for innovation! Maybe you finally have time to adjust your website. Finally time to develop new services or products that match this time. Finally time to write that book.
And then, even when you are alone, we open the doors and sing together on our balconies, we take care of each other by putting groceries in front of each other’s door, or by sharing with each other in other ways. Then you don’t have to be ‘complete’ and love yourself. We are never ‘complete’. Then you are not alone. Then you are All-One.
Eric M. Ooijevaar – Put your ego on a diet! – www.egodieet.nl